- NES Stories -

Continuing the tradition of having at least one of the NES archive sidebars not have anything to do with the NES, I now present the 1999.11.20 edition of |tsr's k-rad list. I list important things going on in the world, and rate them in the scale of "k-rad", "not k-rad" and "soz". Since the TV has Cartoon Network on when the NES is off, the list will probably be filled with comix, manga and animation. Here you go:

- Power Rangers in the Lost Galaxy: K-rad.
- The Scooby-Doo Project: not K-rad. The biggest disappointment of 1999.
- I Am Weasel: K-rad! Who can still watch Star Trek: The Next Generation with a straight face! I can imagine Worf saying "Commander, I will beam down to intercept the aliens... for I, am, Weasel!"
- Space Jam: Soz.
- The current voices for WB characters: Soz! I can do a better Tweety than that!
- Courage The Cowardly Dog: That short was k-rad. The series is not k-rad.
- Mike, Lu and Og: I still haven't seen it. It's, like, the only thing CN doesn't repeat on late night.
- That one Nickelodeon cartoon with the chick with braces who can talk to animals: Ooon, more or less k-rad.
- Amanda Anaconda or whatever (Canadian toon on Fox Family): Soz! Everyone looks scary!
- Popeye directed by Dave Fleischer: K-rad.
- Popeye after that: Not k-rad.
- The original Segar Thimble Theatre newspaper comic with Popeye: The most k-rad of all! (Check a library.)
- The way Flake News used to be a cool web site, but then published a book and turned the site into a big ad for it: Soz.
- Pokemon - The First Movie: Not so k-rad. - Pikachu's Vacation: K-rad! Trippy! Yellow Submarine has nothing on that short.
- The Gary Coleman Show: Any show that presupposes that Gary Coleman has died is k-rad with me.
- Dexter's Laboratory: K-rad.
- Cow & Chicken: Definitely not k-rad.
- Those 2 new Yogi Bear toons: Not k-rad.
- Taking the Mathematica section for math courses: K-rad.
- Toonami: Automatically not k-rad for tacking new intro sequences on everything they show, but let's dissect it anyway.
- Sailor Moon: K-rad if only for the screenwriters' desperate attempts to show the series was not set in Japan.
- Ronin Warriors: Not k-rad.
- Thundercats: Surprisingly k-rad.
- Voltron: Probably not quite as k-rad as I remembered it. And no, I did not have the 3-ft tall complete robot as a kid. I had a Castle Greyskull.
- Robotech: Not k-rad.
- Biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirdman: K-rad!
- Space Ghost: I think all incarnations are k-rad.
- Road Runner: Not k-rad.
- Catdog: Not k-rad.
- Hey Arnold: Not k-rad.
- Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: They will always be k-rad. Except for that live action TV show at the end.
- Stickin' Around (another Canadian show, shown as a Fox summer replacement): Incredibly k-rad! Anyone got tapes?
- Kanji & Kana, Revised Edition by Hadamitzky and Spahn: Kind of k-rad, but not enough examples.
- Most of the manga that gets translated into English and published here: Not k-rad. Sorry.
- Most of the manga that got published in Mangajin: K-rad.
- The Honeymooners: K-rad.
- Cats: Not k-rad.
- Dogs: K-rad. Except for the kind me grandma enjoys.
- Raccoooons: Not k-rad.
- Bears: K-rad. I mean the animal kind.
- Dolphins: Soz.
- Horses: K-rad.
- Speed Racer: Holy shitballs! There cannot be anything more k-rad than this.
- This dude in the matrix class I'm taking that plays multiplayer net shooters all day, MUDs the rest of the day, and asks incredibly inane questions in class: Not k-rad. And he reads Star Wars novels in class, too.
- Cartoon Planet: Wow, that was a k-rad show while it lasted.
- Zoobooks: I donno, it looks like you can learn a lot about animals if you read it.
- WEFT 90.1 Champaign: K-rad. Although it'd be neat if there was a SIDtune show.
- SID tunes: K-rad.
- Adlib tunes: Not k-rad.
- Any music from George Alisdair "The Fat Man" Sanger: Soz.
- Alistair from You Can't Do That on Television: K-rad. I had a thing for Lisa Ruddy too.
- Rocky and Bullwinkle: I don't think it's as k-rad as people say.
- The Boondocks: It has yet to prove to me whether it's k-rad or not.
- Siberia Tetsudo Satsujinjiken (シベリア鉄道殺人事件) by Kyotaro Nishimura: K-rad.
- Six Flags Theme Parks: Soz for suddenly firing all their seasonal workers.
- Williams pinball: All extremely k-rad. But they can't make a profit, while Sega can make South Park pinballs until hell freezes over. That's life.
- South Park: K-rad.
- Gobliins II from Coktel Vision: K-rad!
- Wolfenstein 3d: K-rad.
- Everything after that: Not k-rad.
- C-Span airing the proceedings of the British House of Commons: K-rad.
- ESPN2 airing soccer: Not k-rad.
- Mean Machines: Not k-rad.
- CVG: Soz.
- PC Format, even now: K-rad.
- Computer Gaming World up to about 96: K-rad.
- Computer Gaming World after 96: Soz. What the hell happened? Ziff-Davis, that's what!
- The t-shirt that came with SNES Illusion of Gaia: K-rad.
- Meijer Macaroni and Cheese, White Cheese flavor: K-rad (hint: it's Kraft M+C without the orange coloring and therefore 15 cents cheaper).
- Rugrats: Not k-rad. First off I don't like the voice-synth music.
- If I had a time machine, then it would be: K-rad.
- Second Reality from Future Screw: K-rad.
- FCI Super Time, a Japanese news program for dudes in the US: Not k-rad.
- The CCTV (China) news, English edition: K-rad.
- Alas Singko y Medya: K-rad. And it's got a super k-rad theme tune!
- SCOLA 1: K-rad. Except they always cut off programs just when they're at the good part.
- A&W Root Beer: K-rad because it's always on sale.
- Cherry Coke: Soz.
- The way my 32mbit EPROM Game Boy cart is the same clear purple color as my Game Boy Color: K-rad.
And finally, The Powerpuff Girls: Kind of k-rad, I guess.



Selections from the Nintendo Power catalog

Roulette from Nintendo Company Japan <
Roulette from Nintendo Company Japan
Proving that Nintendo's first USA product was not arcade games, this is a cheap, small roulette set with a tiny white plastic ball going around a wheel about the size of an NES game. There's no date, but from the looks of things it's from around the 60s. Check the funky Nintendo logo on the side of the box!

Mario figurine from ?
Little Mac figurine from ?
King Hippo figurine from ?
Super Donkey Kong GB Bubble Bath from ?
   - Not NES-related, but toooo cuute to resist

Disney cup from Capcom
Double Dragon board game from Tiger Electronics
Tiger's first and only non-electronic game. Even though they licensed the game from Technos Japan, screenshots from the NES version (and not the arcade) are used on the board.

The Legend of Zelda beach towel from ?
The Legend of Zelda board game from Milton Bradley
The Legend of Zelda board game (Box) from Milton Bradley
  - Anyone with more info on this (ie. rules, pieces, etc.)?
The Legend of Zelda jacket from Nintendo
The Legend of Zelda maze game from Largo
The Legend of Zelda - Molblin's Magic Spear from Golden
The Legend of Zelda pillowcase from ?
The Legend of Zelda plates from ?
Luigi doll from ?
  - This thing is HUGE!
Luigi key chain from ?
Mario baseball cap from ?
  - Probably not vintage, judging by the Web URL on the back
Mario candy holders from Topps
Party Mario/Bowling Mario cross stitch leaflet from Plaid Enterprises
  - Looks more like "Bocce Mario" to me
Skateboard Mario/POW cross stitch book from Plaid Enterprises
Sporty Mario/Nintendo Power Mario cross stitch book from Plaid Enterprises
Super Star Mario/Princess Toadstool cross stitch leaflet from Plaid Enterprises
Mario/Zelda cup from Nintendo
Mario/Zelda cup from Nintendo
  - A mail-in offer from specially marked boxes of Nintendo Cereal System
Mario doll from Applause
Mario doll (Another view)
  - (c) 1989. About seven inches and kind of odd looking
Mario plush doll from ?
Mario/Zelda folder from Nintendo
Mario glasses case from ?
Mario jacket from Nintendo
Mario jigsaw puzzle from Milton Bradley
Mario jigsaw puzzle (Another) from Milton Bradley
Mario poster from Nintendo
Mario Punch from Shasta

Mario Shampoo from ?
Mario vending machine insert from Nintendo
This is an insert meant for use with the 25-cent gumballmachine-style vendors you see at K-Marts. This machine was meant to sell various Mario-related cards and stickers. Avoid the gotcha?

Mario water squirter from Entertech
Mario/Luigi piggy banks from ?
Nintendo 1990 Calendar from Nintendo
Nintendo 1991 Calendar from Nintendo
Nintendo Award Stickers from Mello Smello
Nintendo Collector Pins from Ace Novelty Co.
Nintendo suitcase from ?
  - Now this is one k-rad piece of gear
Nintendo pencil case from ?
Nintendo Trophy Figures from Hasbro
Nintendo Sticker Activity Album from Diamond
  - Nice art on this thing
Nintendo In-store Sign from Nintendo
  - "We have Nintendo", as displayed at EB and other stores
Nintendo Stickers Value Pack from Mello Smello
Nintendo Walltrim from ?
Nintendo Walltrim (pic 2) from ?
Nintendo World Class Service pin from Nintendo
  - Has a flashing-red LED next to the phone number
Princess Toadstool music box from ?
  - Oh dear - don't be caught in the kitchen with this
Princess Toadstool shampoo from ?
Punch-Out cap from Nintendo
Punch-Out trash can from Nintendo
Super Mario Bros. Alarm Clock from Nintendo
Super Mario Bros. AM Radio from Playtime
Super Mario Bros/Zelda bedsheet from ?
Super Mario Bros. Bike Cop from ?
  - A bicycle alarm featuring the fearsome Nintendo logo
Super Mario Bros. board game from Milton Bradley
Super Mario Bros. canisters from ?
Super Mario Bros. cap from Nintendo
Super Mario Bros. Cookie Cutters from Wilton
  - Wilton made several different sizes of these
Super Mario Bros. cup from Nintendo
Super Mario Bros. Dixie-cup holder from ?
Super Mario Bros. egg cup from ?
Super Mario Bros. egg cup (Pic 2) from ?
Super Mario Bros. fan from ?
Super Mario Bros. Handheld Shower Head from ?
Super Mario Bros. light holder from ?
Super Mario Bros. lunch box from Aladdin
Super Mario Bros/Zelda lunch box from Aladdin
Super Mario Bros. pillowcase from ?
Super Mario Bros. Tabletop Pinball game from PlayTime
Super Mario Bros. Tabletop Pinball game (Pic 2) from PlayTime
  - Cheap! Cheap! Cheap!
Super Mario Bros. TV Tray from ?
  - A somewhat loose interpretation of the SMB characters here
Super Mario Bros. trash can from Nintendo
Super Mario Bros. 2 wall clock from Nintendo
Super Mario Bros.2 shoelace Bow Biters from Avon Products
  - "Give your shoes Nintendo power as Mario and Luigi ride the laces up front!"
Super Mario Bros. sleeping bag from ?
Super Mario Bros. 2 glass from ?
Super Mario Bros. 2 glass (Another view)
Super Mario Bros. 2 glass mug from ?
  - Mario looks kind of stupid in this one.. I dunno
Super Mario Bros. 2 wallet from Avon Products

Super Mario Bros. 3 Alarm Clock from ?
Super Mario Bros. 3 trash can from Nintendo
Super Mario Bros. 3 Walkie Talkie from ?
Tetris board game from Parker Bros.

Topps Nintendo trading cards
Nintendo trading stickers from Diamond Publishing
National Safe Kids Campaign trading cards


Eventually I will devote an entirely new section to magazines of the NES era. Until then, you can feast your eyes on these scans:

Nintendo Fun Club News, issue #2, Summer 1987
Nintendo Fun Club News, issue #3, Fall 1987
Nintendo Fun Club News, issue #4, Winter 1987
Nintendo Fun Club News, issue #5, February/March 1988
Nintendo Fun Club News, issue #6, April/May 1988
Nintendo Fun Club News, issue #7, June/July 1988

Nintendo Power, issue #1, July/August 1988
Nintendo Power, issue #2, September/October 1988

The Best of the Nintendo Comics System

Mad #291, January 1990
This cover was by longtime Mad artist Sam Viviano. Many hundreds of kids (including me) wrote to the magazine soon after this issue to point out a mistake - Viviano put an "M" on both Mario and Luigi's cap...

Hotdog #58 from Scholastic (devoted to Nintendo)


Color TV Game 15/Color TV Game Racing 112 flyer from Nintendo
Color TV Game Block Kuzushi (Block Destroyer) flyer from Nintendo
Ads for two of Nintendo's pre-NES home consoles. Neither of these units accept cartridges; like Pong consoles they only play certain games by themselves. These all date from the late 70s/early 80s. Very cool stuff! (And, I'd imagine, very hard to find stuff nowadays.)

Early Famicom advertisement flyer from Nintendo
This ad features most of Nintendo's early FC games. It's hard to see from the scan, but the flyer mentions one unreleased game called Donkey Kong Music Education (Donkey Kong Ongaku Kyouiku).

Famicom 3D System ad from Nintendo
Family Computer Disk System software flyer from Nintendo
Famicom Pro System from Hudson
  - A plastic snap-in case for your Famicom and Disk System
Family Basic V3 ad from NIntendo
Family Basic/Keyboard flyer from Nintendo
Family Basic Data Recorder flyer from Nintendo

Algos no Senshi (Rygar) from Tecmo
Tecmo Theater: Captain Tsubasa from Tecmo
Dead Zone from Sunsoft
Dragon Quest from Enix
Dragon Quest II from Enix
Dragon Quest III from Enix
Dragon Quest IV from Enix
Exerion from Jaleco
Field Combat from Jaleco
Flappy from dB-Soft
Galaga from Namco
Golgo 13 from Vic Tokai
Kieta Princess from Imagineer
Lipple Island from Sunsoft
Lipple Island (Another) from Sunsoft
Lode Runner from Hudson
Madoola no Tsubasa from Sunsoft
Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!! from Nintendo
Nakayama Miho no Tokimeki High School from Nintendo
Nazo no Murasamejo from Nintendo
Nazora Land from Sunsoft
Nazora Land 3 from Sunsoft
Portopia Renzoku Satsujinjiken from Enix
  - "The Portopia Serial Murders", the first FC adventure game (1985)
Shinjinrui from Hudson
  - aka Adventures of Dino-Riki, oddly enough
Shin Onigashima from Nintendo
Sky Destroyer from Taito
Solomon no Kagi (Solomon's Key) from Tecmo
Spelunker 2 from Irem
Star Soldier from Hudson
  - Look, it's that dude from Starship Hector! Holy clip art reuse, Batman!
Super Arabian from Sunsoft
Super Chinese (Kung-Fu Heroes) from Namco
  - This ad features a send-in offer for a free phone card with purchase
Super Monkey Daibouken from VAP
Super Star Force from Tecmo
SWAT from Toei Animation
Tsuppari Ohzumou from Tecmo
Thexder from Square
Tokaido 53-ji from Sunsoft
Xevious from Namco
Zanac from Pony Canyon
Zelda from Nintendo
  - Thanks to Matt McGrath for sending a cleaned-up version of this ad
Zeta Gundam from Bandai

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